1-8-10 "Simple"

We live in a world that is so hard to understand. We are constantly looking for the truth, looking for the answer, looking for a sign, to fulfill this emptiness we have inside of us. Life isn’t so bad. There is lots of beauty around us; there are lots of joys and excitement to take part in. However, at the end of the day when we head back to our apartments or houses we are so alone. It is that moment when we lay our heads down on our pillows and the world becomes still. It is that moment when darkness fills the room and we are only left with our minds. It is in that moment when all you should be doing is falling asleep that you find yourself wide awake and thinking of anything and everything. It is those moments when we are not at rest, we are not content, and we are not satisfied. Hearing your heart beat out of your chest is not a sign that we are alive, but rather a sign that we are impatient, we are stressed, we are pressured, we are not calm and not at ease. What is it about the silence that drives us crazy? It’s like we are not comfortable in our own skin. We can’t stand to listen to ourselves breathe or think. We become scared and afraid of what will come next.
Life shouldn’t be so complicated and rather it is not. We tend to make it seem more difficult that it should be. Work, Eat, Sleep is a rather simple concept but somewhere in that simplicity we tend to create and cause drama because simple is not good enough for us, simple is boring, simple brings us back to calm and we can’t handle calm. So we have created this stressful highly competitive world around us so that somehow we feel more meaningful and feel as if we have a purpose. We create pressures around us so that we have something to compete or strive for. If something is not difficult to accomplish then reaching it will mean nothing. We want what we can not have. We drive ourselves crazy inside trying so hard to have what is not meant for us. We chase other people dreams, we chase fame, we chase money, we chase happiness, and we chase love all in an attempt to hold ownership over it. We do not value things but rather abuse them. We take for granted dreams we have accomplished, we take for granted people that love us, we take for granted our gifts and abilities, we take for granted our friends and family, and we take for granted God. It takes losing those things for us to finally see that we took it for granted. And then the cycle starts all over again. We chase after those things again and then once again take them for granted. Why is this the case? Why is it so hard to be thankful? Because we don’t like stability or simplicity. Once something becomes too stable or consistent in our lives we take it for granted. New Love, New jobs, new friends, new things intrigue us and we want it. So we tend to leave those we care about to try to fill this new desire in us. That new desire is only there because we allowed our flame to burn out. What is desire? What makes you desire something? Desire comes from a passion inside you to do something. Something that makes you smile, that makes you feel alive is a passion. Chasing after someone new is a desire because it makes you feel that rush again. It gives you an intense feeling. People get burned out doing the same things for so long. It’s just like we can not eat the same food every day of our lives. Even if that food was amazing and would taste amazing everyday, it wouldn’t matter. In our head we have decided that it will become old and not taste as good, when in reality is tastes the exact same on day 7 as it did on day 1. We are stubborn and need variety. Look at the world around us. There are millions of colors because white and black don’t satisfy us. There are millions of restaurants because we want to have choices so once again we feel in control. There are millions of brands because our culture is so swayed by the popular vote. One year skinny jeans are out and the next they are in. They look no different in than they did out but society has persuaded everyone that they are cool now. No wonder we are small minded and fail to have strong opinions. Because most of this world is based on conforming to what everyone else is doing? No one wants to be left out or be looked down upon. Who would? Having no friends is not fun. Being alone is one of the worst feelings out there. So we try so hard to hold on to something or someone so that we don’t have to feel empty. But sometimes what we are holding onto is not good for us. But what do we care, we are not alone right? Why is the divorce rate over 50%? Because many people don’t know what love is. They just want something to hold onto, they want to be loved. Many people settle because of the fear of loneliness. But in the end, they still end up alone and more miserable. They found a temporary fulfillment for their problem. This is true with everything. Drinking sometimes fills a void in us and makes us feel better for awhile. But after our 3 or 4 hours of fun we still wake up with our same problems and even a hangover. It only serves as a temporary fulfillment for our needs or wants.
We can not change it because this is how we are wired. This is how culture and society has changed us. We don’t know how to appreciate things or this life because we don’t ever slow down enough to look at it. We don’t even notice the color of the flowers outside, or the smiling stranger walking past you, or the hand of God upon you. There is so much that we really don’t see. We can’t see unless we slow down, stop, and look. We can’t do that because the silence and the calmness drive us crazy. We don’t know how to relax and enjoy life because we feel that enjoying life means doing more. Doing all these things before you die. When you die you won’t be able to look back on your life and say I am glad I did everything on my bucket list, or say I regret this and that. So why not focus on what will matter when we do die. And that is God. As simple as that seems to be………..it is still one of the hardest things to do. And why???? It’s that little word “simple”.